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Nervous Breakdowns

from Recount by Disappearing Ink

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about

I wrote this song in October 2020. Informed as it was by the pandemic and political chaos of the time, I worried that it would sound out of date or even paranoid before 2021 even arrived. It still felt over the top in late December when I recorded backing tracks, even though President Trump's refusal to acknowledge his election loss seemed to promise some sort of cataclysm before the inauguration.

The first week of January, I stayed in a cabin for three nights in rural Western Maryland. Cell service was almost nonexistent. On January 5, I set up mics to record vocals to this and two other songs written during the second half of 2020. On January 6, I stepped outside to check my cell signal and got this text from my wife: "They've stormed the Capitol. Barricades and guns drawn in the Senate." I went back in and recorded these lyrics and spent the night mixing.

lyrics

Nervous breakdowns, constant shakedowns;
There are fewer of us, but we have less to lose.

Despairing hours, or a moment of power:
Tell me…which would you choose.

And the time keeps on ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking,
And every day feels the same.

Keep your distance at death’s insistence.
Hold your breath and watch truth die.

Schemes and ruses, scrapes and bruises:
Now we know who kept their powder dry.

And the time keeps on ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking,
And every day feels the same.

They’re watching me watching you watching us,
Taking liberties we’d left to rust.
When I see your blood, you’ll see my trust.

Suspicion showers, violence flowers,
And the meekest of us will pick a side.

Can’t you see how the troubles are here now?
And the future is no one’s to decide.

And the time keeps on ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking,
And every day feels the same.

credits

from Recount, released March 5, 2021
Lawrence Lanahan: drums, bass, vocals, guitar, Yamaha CP-30 electric piano

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about

Disappearing Ink Baltimore, Maryland

New album 6/1/23 from Baltimore songwriter/producer Lawrence Lanahan's band Disappearing Ink! On The Charm of Abstraction, Lanahan abandons guitar for mesmerizing synths, intricately programmed beats, imaginative sampling, and occasional rhymes. Even with a new sound, his core songwriting voice--“melodic and lyrical invention,” “chilling chord progressions,” “rare honesty and power"- remains. ... more

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